You Cannot Outlove God Even in Loving Yourself (Dr. Muthoni Omukhango with Charlie Marq, USA)

Did I ever tell you how my husband, Patrick Omukhango prayed for a wife with long, flowing hair and a well-defined hairline? Oh, he had dreams—visions, even.

I call this one: You Cannot Outlove God Even in Loving Yourself

My quiet and thoughtful Patrick longed for a wife who mirrored his reserved nature, with cascading silk-black hair that seemed to have a life of its own.

Imagine the type of hair that would inspire poetry or make a shampoo commercial director weep tears of joy. Where did this dream come from? I blame it on the soap operas. They had him convinced that life with a soft-spoken, impossibly graceful woman with magazine-worthy hair would be the ultimate happily ever after.

And then, God intervened (for me, I think 🤣).

What did God give Patrick instead? He gave him me—a woman who can talk her way through her daily word quota and generously dip into Patrick’s silent reserves too.

God must have looked at my husband and thought, ‘What this man needs is balance. Someone who can speak life into every situation—literally.’

In a stroke of divine humour, Patrick’s envisioned wife of few words was replaced by someone who could write a book on the beauty of conversation itself. But what else did I bring to the table? A heart that complements his strengths, a partnership rooted in advancing God’s Kingdom, and an unrelenting belief that marriage thrives when two uniquely different people come together for a common, joint or united purpose.

Now, let’s talk about this hair for a moment. Patrick had prayed for long, flowing locks. What he got was a wife whose family genetics could best be described as interesting. You see, in my family, the hairline doesn’t begin at the forehead—it starts closer to the ears, like it’s shy of commitment. 😭

And as for growth? It’s an Olympic marathon runner at best. Ten years for an inch of hair is standard in my family. What irony! The man who dreamed of a wife with luscious locks ended up with someone who genuinely considers shaving her head every time life gets too busy.

But love, as we know, is all about compromise. Patrick loves to see my hair loose, so I do my best to honour that. If left to me, I’d go full-on minimalist—short and stress-free. Yet here I am, now the proud wearer of sister locks, a transition since December 2024, from my 8-year-old dreadlocks (thank you, technology!)

The sisterlocks are neat, manageable, and—most importantly—give Patrick the illusion of “flowing hair.” God has a sense of humour, doesn’t He? Patrick says, his words not mine,

“I am so favoured and blessed to have you as my wife. I thought I knew what I wanted or needed in life, but even I, could not outlove God in loving myself. God gave me the best wife for me-forget the flowing hair and all.”

Here are my lessons from “You Cannot Outlove God Even in Loving Yourself”

  1. God Knows What You Need Better Than You Do
    My husband, Patrick, had a dream—one shaped by soap operas and ideals he thought were perfect for him. But God, in His infinite wisdom, had other plans. He gave Patrick not what he imagined, but what he truly needed: me. The lesson? What we think we need or want is often limited by our understanding, but God always sees the bigger picture. He knows how to give us the perfect blessings, tailored to our purpose and journey.
  2. Love is About Balance and Growth
    Patrick and I are as different as night and day—he’s quiet and reflective, while I could probably talk my way through a global summit. But our differences are what make us stronger together. Marriage, I’ve learned, isn’t about finding someone who mirrors you but someone who complements and challenges you to grow. God’s design in pairing us wasn’t random; it was purposeful, teaching us that love thrives on balance, not sameness.
  3. God’s Humour Teaches Us to Embrace Ourselves
    Patrick prayed for a wife with long, flowing hair, but God gave him a woman with an “adventurous” hairline and slow-growing strands. Yet, through this, we’ve both learned to laugh, compromise, and embrace reality with gratitude. My sisterlocks may not meet Patrick’s initial dream, but they symbolize the beauty of love and compromise. God often uses these humorous “mismatches” to teach us to love ourselves—and each other—as we are, showing that true love transcends superficial expectations.

Ultimately, God’s love for us surpasses even our ability to love ourselves. Through every twist (or lock!) of life, He reminds us that His plans are always perfect.

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But this post isn’t about my hair or even about my marriage. It’s about what’s currently in my hand—a book that’s captured my attention this January.

Let me introduce you to Mudrunner by Charlie Marq of Forge, USA. This is my January read. Why this book, you ask?

Mudrunner is a riveting story of resilience and redemption. Charlie Marq masterfully weaves a story of faith through the messy moments of life. The protagonist, Charlie, finds himself navigating both literal and figurative muddy waters, learning to lean on God’s strength when human effort falls short. It’s a story that will inspire you to trust God even when life feels like a never-ending obstacle course.

I chose this book to remind myself—and maybe even you—that life’s messiest moments often pave the way for God’s greatest miracles.

I am a mudrunner, I think. Are you a mudrunner? You might be if you are:

-Willing to go all-in,

-Determined to overcome any obstacle, and

-Ready to fight to the finish no matter what it takes.

Jesus is looking for mudrunners. Not the kind who participate in Tough Mudders and Warrior Dashes, but men and women willing to advance His Kingdom as a way of life.

In this book, Charlie shares riveting stories from his own Kingdom adventures across the globe: proclaiming Jesus to forgotten tribes, witnessing miracles, pushing back spiritual darkness, even running from a lion!

He also provides Biblical challenges, equipping and inspiring believers to join Jesus in His Kingdom cause—whether across the street or across the sea. Mud-running isn’t easy. It comes with hard assignments, great sacrifices, and a constant dependence on God. But it’s a race worth running—because Jesus is worthy of it!

You can grab a copy from Christian Literature Communications – CLC Kenya and if you’re up for it, let’s read it together. What do you think? No pressure, of course. But Mudrunner is the kind of book that might just leave you running—not from mud, but into the arms of the God who carries us through it.

So, here’s to January, sister locks, unexpected blessings, and stories that transform us. Care to join me?

Mudrunner by Charlie Marq. Let’s get reading!

With African Christian Authors Book Award – ACABA

CLC Kids & Teens

Christian Kitabu

https://kenyaclc.org/category/forge-speakers/?v=a2e1f137298d

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